Vampire Vocab

  I, for once, am not looking for vampires. Well, I am, but I’m pretty sure that the character we are interviewing today is not a vampire. Rather, I have reason to believe that Xena, a new, grey cat addition to my jovial bunch of stuffed animals, is a zombie. You see, she seems very single minded and persistent, has cold, soulless eyes, and staggers around holding her paws in front of her. Also, my stuffed animals heads seem to have been drained of their cotton brains. Therefore, I decided to inconspicuously ask her a few questions to determine carefully whether or not my suspisions are correct. Of course, I would never let on that I thought she might be a zombie…

Me: Xena, are you a zombie?

Xena: Brains…

(Ohh…evasive! Maybe I shouldn’t have written off vampire so soon!)

Me: Where do you see yourself ten years from now?

Xena: Brains…

(See, single minded! She should elaborate, though. Does she want to be a neuro-surgeon?)

Me: Are the other animals nice to you?

Xena: Brains…

(Is she insulting my animals intelligence? Hmmph!)

Me: What’s your favorite book?

Xena: Brains…

(What an odd name. I’ll have to look it up.)

Me: What’s your favorite food?

Xena: Brains…

Me: Wow! You’re the first person I’ve met that actually likes head cheese! Thanks so much for your time, Xena. Can I give you anything to thank you?

Xena: Brains, you idiot!

Me: Ummm…no.

I made a hurried exit. Xena seemed a tad bit aggravated, like she had repeated herself to the point of redundancy for someone who was missing an obvious truth. I can’t imagine why. She seemed a little terse during our interview, but showed no signs of being a zombie. Maybe I just interviewed a real vampire, unlike that poseur Miles!

This entry was posted on Sunday, August 2nd, 2009 at 9:26 pm and is filed under Interviews, Ramblings.
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